Ampunkan dosaku..

Lately I have been having doubts on whether we should be going for Umrah or not. I know its a good thing and I have postponed it far too many times, and given that we have gone through so many unhappy moments in the past years, I thought that the trip to Umrah would do us a lot of good.

I know that if you have faith in Allah he will reward us with blessings beyond our imaginations.. but being the pessimist that I am, I started stressing over our finances and got all upset. I guess Allah has shown me some light as I realised that all the people I talked to have encouraged us to go for Umrah despite the financial difficulties.

Like Najee said, " You shouldn't put off good things. Just go and then think about the next course of action later. InsyaAllah Allah will help you."

When I spoke to Yong, she too said the same thing and so did Zaman and Zailene.

I know I want to go, but I was worried that if we use up our savings, we might be short of cash for our plans after like paying for the house, the medical bills for the pregnancy etc. I will be out of work by early next year and saving this much money will take us a long time...

BUT, I am sure Allah has something planned for us. He just wants to see if we were really serious about going and if we were going to give up.

Mama called this morning and she told me that Allah wouldn't like it if I said that by going for Umrah we will have no money. Hmm, now I feel really guilty for saying all the negative things before this.

Ya Allah, ampunkan dosa ku dan murahkan rezeki kami untuk ke tanah sucimu..